Tuesday, September 6, 2022

Convenience (MTL Novel) Chapter 5

C5


Although Bianca ended up sleeping with Fernand, it didn't mean that it would have been pleasant. Still, it had been less painful than with her husband, though not because Bianca loved Fernand, but because Fernand wasn't as well endowed as Zachary.

 

However, she was happy. Bianca decided to think about it positively, despite knowing that she was having an affair and that things would become troublesome for her if she got caught. The world seemed sunny and bright, and she felt like she was floating on clouds. That's how deep Bianca fell into her relationship with Fernand.

 

And then one day the news came that Zachary had been shot and killed in the war. Her death itself didn't make Bianca feel any way, but it was the realization that she was now free of her that brought about a feeling of happiness.

 

His father and brother had already perished earlier in the war, leaving the county of Blanchefort to be entrusted to Arno. Bianca was under the impression that she might marry Fernand while he seized the counties of Blanchefort and Arno, as well as receive her dowry. Although Fernand was just a minstrel, that couldn't stop them from getting married, and her child would be the future Count Blanchefort! Bianca was excited just by the thought.

 

But his happiness was short-lived. Bianca only realized something was amiss when Zachary's older brother, Viscount Roland de Hugues, took over Arno County. Roland had stated that Bianca was not an Arno, aware that there was no child born to her and her brother. Furthermore, he was aware of her affair as well, though Bianca didn't know how, and she used him as a basis to prevent him from getting her dowry back from her.

 

 To make matters worse, he even seized the county of Blanchefort. Although Bianca vehemently protested, saying that she didn't make any sense, her affair with Fernand was her biggest obstacle. No one would defend her. Roland also had the support of the king's uncle, Duke Jacob of Sevran. As a result, Bianca, with no backup of her own, was eventually kicked out of it with nothing but the clothes on her back.

 

Despite all her misfortunes, Bianca still trusted her lover, Fernand. He had fervently confessed to her before that he would love her no matter what, and her bright blue eyes had been nothing but genuine. And so, even though she no longer had anything to her name, she Bianca held on to that firm belief and went looking for him.

 

Only to be received coldly.

 

"Oh, my silly lady." Please don't be so clingy as this is where we part ways. You used to be more worthy than this, didn't you? I know you've lost everything, but isn't that why you should at least try to keep some of that dignity at a minimum?

 

—Fernand, why are you like this all of a sudden?

 

“Because I no longer have any reason to get involved with you. 

 

The flowery smile that was normally always present on Fernand's face was nowhere to be seen. The crinkles in his eyes no longer emitted warmth, but instead reflected disdain, a look that seemed to call her pathetic. The memory of him pressing a soft kiss to her cheek felt like yesterday, and yet the Fernand in front of her was now acting like a completely different person. Bianca's lips fluttered, unable to believe her sudden change in demeanor.

 

"What do you say, Fernando?" We are in love with each other...

 

"I think the correct term would be lust, not love." My poor foolish lady. To think that you would lose everything by being blinded by lust. But please don't try to blame me. Didn't I tell you several times that you shouldn't fall in love with me?

 

Fernand easily spat out his excuses and he was not wrong. In fact, that was what he had told her earlier.  

 

“You shouldn't fall in love with me, Lady Arno. I'm having a hard time as I'm trying to keep my wits together. Please be the one to draw the line between us.

 

His unflinching eyes seemed to be looking straight into her soul, and his lips had quivered slightly when they pressed onto hers, almost as if he was trying to hide his feelings for her.

 

Listening to Fernand now, Bianca felt that everything their relationship had been until now was an illusion, an illusion that had now dissipated. The sudden change in her lover inflicted a pain on her heart that was greater than the death of her husband. She felt stiff and dizzy, unable to recover easily.

 

 A gust of icy wind made her shiver. Normally, she would have had her lovely white fox fur cape, or her gray squirrel fur lined coat, but all she had on now was an old blanket. It was a tattered and worn blanket that she would never have used before, not even for her feet, but Bianca hadn't cared, thinking that everything would be fine as long as Fernand stayed by her side.

 

But reality showed that it was different from the melodies of a minstrel's song.

 

Bianca's lips tightened and her frown only deepened as Fernand's sarcastic comments continued. The wounds from her betrayal were too much for her, causing her to lose the ability to swallow even with such a harsh retort.

 

“…That wasn't lust for me. To be honest-

 

-Mrs. I understand how desperate you must be feeling right now, but please don't try to lie. I am fully aware that she felt lonely because of the frequent absence of her husband. Isn't that why you showed interest towards me?

 

Her sharp rebuttal stabbed into her delicate heart like a dagger. Fernand put all the blame for her failed relationship on her. This was not right. He was wrong. How could he say that it was all just lust?

 

Bianca had simply felt alone.

 

 It was not easy for her to live in the giant castle of Arno where no one wanted her. She no longer wanted to endure the draft of cold air in her room alone. Would things have been different if she had been more loving to her husband? But Bianca didn't have the courage to try to change her relationship that was already entrenched in indifference.

 

It was to be expected that someone as lonely as Bianca would easily fall in love with the handsome Fernand, who was as soft and sweet as he seems. He had behaved as if he would do anything for her, so it was easy for Bianca to believe in her love, since her only other experience with men had been Zachary.

 

“I was able to seduce you easily thanks to that. I will even receive a rich reward from Viscount Hugues, ah, or should I say Earl now. I enjoyed our nights together, but you know that too, don't you? How precious is the thing called money? So even if I ignore you now, please understand my feelings.

 

Bianca's head throbbed. Viscount Hugues, Zachary's older brother, was the man who had kicked her to the sidewalk. She was surprised to find out that he and Fernand knew each other, but she couldn't understand why Fernand would be rewarded by the viscount.

 

Fernand decided to strike one last blow when he saw the stunned look on her face, staring at him like a rain-soaked kitten.

 

“My ignorant and naive lady. You must think that the world is all sunshine and rainbows. To think that you would fall in love with a minstrel who came to your castle out of the blue. That's not something that would even appear in a clichéd romance novel, is it? Did you really feel nothing wrong? I don't know how a noble lady like you was raised to innocently believe the world would be so kind.

 

 "Fernand!!

 

Fernand had ridiculed her to the end. Bianca reflected on her conversation countless times as she watched the figure on her back turn away from her after heartlessly tossing her aside. It was only after a long time that she realized that everything had been planned; Fernand must have been ordered by Viscount Hugues to approach her.

 

But by the time he realized it, it was already too late. Bianca was left with nothing: no inheritance, love, children or family. She doesn't even remember her. Everything had been shattered and reduced to ashes.

 

-Bastard.

 

Even in the present, nothing but curses came out when he thought of Fernand again. Not even the tears. She had suppressed the trauma of her sex with her love for Fernand, but he had deceived her by claiming that it had all been lust. Besides, what had been the results of her illicit love affair? Bianca had been thrown to the cold stone floor for her debauchery. Fernand had tried so hard to seduce her not because he had fallen madly in love with her, but because he had been instigated by Viscount Hugues. This only made Bianca's heart harden and close when it came to intimate relationships between a man and a woman.

 

Bianca let out a hollow breath and shifted her gaze to stare out the window, watching the sunset. She recalled the memory of her listening to Fernand play the strings of her lute, the two of them hidden from everyone else's eyes. She had been happy then, feeling like the protagonist of a romance novel, but now all she felt was disgust, knowing that it had all been a lie and part of a conspiracy.

 

Bianca gritted her teeth, her eyes glinting with venom as she vowed revenge if she ever saw him again.

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